A lot of people ask me, 'Elliott, isn’t it hard to work with your spouse?' And boy, is it ever! When we launched Madhu Chocolate in 2018, we knew exactly what we wanted from our business. We had clear ideas about the yummy Indian style products we wanted to create, our target market, and the growth processes we needed. However, what we hadn't anticipated was the sheer amount of time we'd be spending together - literally all the time. Seriously. All. The. Freaking. Time. This constant closeness can really test a relationship, especially since we’re both quite headstrong. But, despite all our challenges, there are many wonderful aspects to building a business with your spouse.
One of the first things you notice is how quickly a minor work conflict can turn personal. It's astonishing how a simple comment like 'I don’t care for that flavor profile' can escalate into 'You’ve NEVER loaded the dishwasher correctly in our 10 years together, and if I have to fix it one more time, we’re done!' After a few months of these squabbles, we realized we needed to compartmentalize and communicate more clearly and understandingly. It was, and is, work to have an open dialogue that doesn’t devolve into an argument, and we don’t always succeed. Over the years, and with a lot of intention, we have mostly been able to stay on topic when having a heated work discussion. The dishwasher issue, however, is still a source of contention.
Another unforeseen issue was the never-ending nature of our work. When owning a business, there’s always something to be done, and living with your business partner makes it too easy to turn date night into an impromptu meeting. I can't tell you how many times one of us has rolled over in bed at 11:30 at night to whisper, 'Did the pistachios arrive today?' Nothing gets you ready for a peaceful night’s sleep like worrying about something that could easily wait until morning. Although we’ve gotten better at setting boundaries between work time and home time, we both feel equally passionate about Madhu Chocolate, so I think we’ve accepted that we’ll never be totally free from spontaneous work discussions.
Despite the frustrations of being together both at work and at home, there are incredible benefits. I get to share my successes with the person I love most in the world. When we encounter tough times, we don't have to face them alone. We never need to update each other on a bad day because we were both there. We almost always understand what the other is going through because we’re often in the same situation or present to witness whatever happened. We’re there for each other, always, and that’s a comfort we can hold onto as long as we’re together.